Well Well Well….we have finally reached the year Two-Thousand-Fifteen. The prophesised year of flying hoverboards, flying cars and six years after the declaration of post-racial America. Oh how misguided we have been, huh?
I turned 39 the day before 2015 became official. This means my perspective on things is becoming more and more….irrelevant. It is no secret that the society in which we live caters to the opinion of 18-39 yr olds. Which means I have one more year, just one, to let my opinion known! To this end, instead of taking my customary January-March break from blogging and social media, I have decided to freely let all of my thoughts and ideas out. Fuck it. That’s right, I’m even going to curse when I feel like it. I got one more year to impress upon the world how beautiful and excellent and perfect we all are. This has become a “by any means necessary” type of mission.
Anyway, here is a list of things I know now after experiencing what we collectively named “2014.”
1) Yoga’s not so bad after all
I’ve tried to yoga on several occasions throughout my life, but it never really stuck. I had finally accepted the simple fact that yoga is not for everybody and it certainly was not for me. But then my gym began offering a new yoga class on Monday and Wednesday, and since I’ve changed so many things about myself over the past few years I thought it would be a good idea to see if this latest version of KenJos also dislikes yoga as much as the previous releases.
Come to find out, yoga’s not so bad after all. I know Yoga purists will say that like it for all of the wrong reasons, but from a purely physical benefits point of view it fits perfectly into what I need in my work out and in my life. So I does the yogas now and it makes me feel good.
Lesson: maybe some of the things you used to not like are not so bad…and maybe some of the things you’ve been doing since forever need to be released.
2) Samsara and Me
You know those Zen stories that always end up saying something like “Goshu’s master hit him upon the head, and in that moment he experienced full enlightenment,” then you have some understanding of what happened to me that day. There was no ‘full enlightenment’ but the words “there’s no samsara and me‘ definitely cleared some space.
I listen to Mooji — a lot — and his message is not so different than this one. But sometimes we need to experience the word before understanding it, yanno? On that particular day, I wasn’t feeling down or bad, just out of sorts…in a funk if you will. I knew it as a different movement in my body and emotions than I normally experience and I needed to reach out to somebody in the moment for a word. I tried to verbalize how the world (samsara) was getting me down, and halfway expected a canned “all is well” response in return. Luckily, he saw through the surface of what was happening and simply reminded me of what I already knew but had yet to acknowledge: There is no separation between what I call “me” and “the world.” It all arises within consciousness, in front of the witness, in front of — something I’ve yet to experience for myself yet. But I’ve experienced enough to know that the ‘me’ that feels conflicted is a borrowed identity, a character played on the stage of life. I Am the one who plays him and the one who leaves him here when the play is over.
Someone wrote to Mooji, “is this self that I recognize the Absolute which you speak about?”
To which he kindly replies, “It cannot be the Absolute. If you are still there, if you are still there it cannot be the Absolute. The ultimate plus you? Who are you? How do you explain your existence?”
Guys! There is the Supreme and the rest is equally happening within it:
Samsara. Me. You. Enlightenment. Sin. Pain. Joy. Football. Cancer. War. Sex. Ants. Kool-Aid. How I Met Your Mother. The Future. Video Games. Crystals. Chakras. Karma.
Just stuff that seem to be happening.
That was a very good moment for me in 2014…possibly the last time I identify with a movement within consciousness on that level.
They say Jesus said, “Verily I tell you, No prophet is accepted in his own country.” And I feel like these words speak as much to one’s internal landscape as it does external doubters. Speaking for myself, it has been difficult to take myself seriously. I mean, I know ALL of the things I’ve done and ALL of the things my mind tries to convince me to do. That kind of dude is usually low on the list of people I would normally go to for wisdom.
But nah, Katy’s right, I’m alright to be around. The work has been established and my intentions are pure…whatever comes out from that is going to be good enough.
My childhood pastor would regularly tell us about his drug dealing and street hustling prior to finding the Lord. I wonder when he as able to begin taking himself seriously. I also wonder if it was a woman who urged him to do so. Probably.
Well those are three things I learned in 2014. As usual, there’s always more but I’m not here to ramble on about myself…I REALLY want to hear from you. Who are you now? What’s different or beautifully the same?
Tell me things….