We’re In This (Dance) Together

“We’re in this together” — something we forget as we go about the drudgery and ecstasy of being alive.

The forgetting happens like this:


The self contracts into believing it only exists in this meat-bag


conditioned by a society that stresses competition, separation, and scarcity of resources


creating individuals wholeheartedly believing in the need to ‘taking care of #1.”


Or course there’s nothing wrong with self-care, self-love, self-compassion…the equation above though, leaves us with  a bunch of conceited and narcissistic beings. Basically everything the ego ever does is take care of self.

I don’t know. I feel like if we can re-frame self-care as taking care of self to contribute to the whole; self-compassion as being kind to myself so that I can be kind to others; self-love as creating a loving space for our family, friends and strangers — then maybe things would be better.


This topic came to me when a client of mine apologized for changing her appointment: “I’m so sorry for screwing you up.” And I replied without even thinking, “No such thing. We’re in this together.” Yes because I’m here to serve everyone who crosses my path, and from that place you can’t screw me up. My only plan is to be available, to show up — or not show up as the situation may be. But then I thought about how often I don’t carry that feeling in my heart. Mostly when I’m driving, mostly when I’m battling over relationship territory with my wife, mostly when the small self has contracted into believing it is a real thing and “I” exist separate from anything else.

This opened up a good place of practice for me…learning to look at the world through this lens of being in this together —

your achievement is mine, your pain is mine, your inhale was my exhale, your job is my consumer addiction, my life is your playground.


Very good.