KenJos’ 10 Twitter Don’ts

Well @AdanBeane has gotten me off of my Blog Slump to post my version of things we shouldn’t be doing on Twitter. Thanks dude, I needed the motivation. I look forward to @StuMcdnld @SuperKwa @KeilaBee1 and @QTPIE913’s take on this topic.

10 Twitter Don’ts

1. Don’t expect me to know your schedule or lifestyle or life events just because you posted it on Twitter.

You know good and well we miss tweets all the time. If you want me to know something, DM , Text, email, and last resort: call me. But don’t hold me accountable for knowing something that I very well may have missed because I’m out here in these streets living life and stuff.

Now, that being said…..

2. Don’t act like you ain’t see my tweet when you know you did.

This is just rude and not genuine. Although it can rarely be proven, I know when you’re acting…believe that. So #LetsBeHonest with one another when it comes to this tweeting thing ok? Yup.

3. Don’t Tweet and Drive

Safety First! I’m guilty of this one myself. I LOVES to tweet and drive. But it’s dangerous and it needs to stop. So here it s: I Vow to Not tweet and drive.

(reading Tweets is ok though right?)

4. (4a) Don’t Automatically think I’m talking about you, if you’re wondering then come ask me about it….then again, (4b) Don’t do that either.

Personally, I don’t do the #SubliminalTweet thing. The closest I get to this is when I say something that I know @katybatista will trip on, but that doesn’t count. SO, if you are the dog in the “a hit dog will holla” scenario…keep it to yourself…neither one of us needs that kind of anti-productive interaction.

Which leads me to….

5. Don’t be so sensitive.

MOST of us aren’t here to hurt your feelings, so if they are hurt then it’s probably more about You than about what I said. Yeah.

6. Don’t try to explain Twitter to non-tweeting friends. They just don’t get it.

Once again, I’m guilty of this one. I’ve been clowned enough by my non-tweeting friends to realize that I need to just keep my happy tweeting to myself. Terms like “tweeps” and “tweet-ups” and “all my tweeple” are meant to be kept on Twitter.

7. Don’t mention anything related to you and your toilet or other bodily excretions. Unless it’s #twitterafterdark.

I mean, I just don’t need or want to know about your gas, your bubble guts, or the color of your urine. And yes, sometimes I’ve read something like this and I’ve laughed. That’s because I’m really 12 years old on the inside. #LetMeBeGreat by helping me get over the immaturity of my sense of humor.

8. Don’t take Tweeting for granted. Not everyone can, not everyone does, and not everyone will. You’re special. Act like it.

Do You know why I follow you? No? Well, it’s because I think you have a valid experience and opinion about this thing we’re doing called Life. I actually enjoy reading about the day to day; the triumphs and challenges…it’s like a really long novel that I get to be somewhat invested in. I look forward to it. So show some care when you type that next tweet…think about how it’s going to affect global consciousness. What you put into the world is pretty much exactly what you’re going to get back. Choose wisely.

9. Don’t bring up old sh*t.

Smokey said it best, “Why you bringing up old sh*t?” Just because I tweeted it 10 months, 10 days, or 10 minutes ago doesn’t actually mean I need to be reminded of it all the time. Let’s move on.

10. Don’t be mad if someone makes a “10 Twitter Don’ts” list and you do 8 out of the 10 Don’ts.

Maybe we are all guilty of these things at some point in our twitter lives. That’s ok. One of my favorite things about Life is that it keeps giving us opportunities to grow and get better and transcend old patterns. “Lord” knows I need to transcend patterns. So if you’re reading one of these lists and it hits home, that’s a good thing. You now have an awareness of how your behavior is affecting others; a prime opportunity for you sir or madam. Besides, most of these things are done out of humor and for good times (mine definitely was), so that’s all the more reason to lighten up, laugh at yourself and go back to Tweeting the way you want to Tweet because when it comes down to you it: You’re Gonna Do What You Wanna Do Anyway, now aren’t you?